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Hood's Winks – Life brings lots of questions (Feb. 11, 2015 issue)

How come so many drivers don’t use turn signals? I mean, like, it really isn’t all that hard, y’know? This is particularly irritating when you are waiting to turn left coming out of Walmart. You know that most of the cars approaching from your left are going to turn right, but you can’t bet on that because their turn signals aren’t blinking. You have to sit there until nobody is coming at all.
Why do people drive gray cars on gray roads on rainy days without turning on their headlights? Are they nuts? Don’t they realize nobody can see them? Are they trying to save a buck?
BTW, as I understand it, lights and wipers on rainy days are both required by law. So how come the police don’t uphold these laws? One fine police officer told me it’s because new cars have lights that stay on all the time anyway. Surely they know some people drive 1997 vehicles like my beat-up old pickup?
How come so many women who are wonderful cooks decide to prepare something they’ve never made before when company is coming for a big deal— like Thanksgiving, Christmas or maybe they’re making it for a big shindig at church? Why don’t they use one of the many recipes for which they are famous and which everybody just loves? You know, one of the recipes that they’ve made for years and don’t even have to look up? Why don’t they use one of those? I don’t understand that at all.
How can anybody take up two spaces parking one car, then walk off, evidently feeling no guilt at all?
Why in the world do teens go out on icy days dressed for summertime? One time I was speaking on stage at a college in Alaska—I swear this is all true—in the middle of the winter. I looked down and there, sitting on the first row, was a male student wearing Bermuda shorts and a short-sleeved golf shirt. I couldn’t believe it. I stopped mid-sentence and yelled (subtly) at him, “You gonna freeze to death and die!” He informed me that he was going to catch a plane to Florida as soon as I finished my speech. I will always wonder if he died on the way to the airport.
Recently, when the temperature and the wind speed were in the teens, I sat bundled up, huddled up and drinking hot coffee with friends my age at Steel Rails Coffee House. To my absolute amazement, there was a young lady in there wearing gym shorts! She was attractive and in good company (the person with her is in our church), yet there she was, headed out the door in shorts! I reverted to my automatic fall-back position and, once again, shouted “You gonna freeze to death and die!” She laughed, but I gotta admit she seemed to wonder a bit about my sanity. She was obviously comforted to find out that we knew her friend.
BTW, I shaved my entire head recently—just got tired of messing with what little hair I had left. I look a lot like a cone head. With a tattoo and an earring I’d look like a member of Hells Angels. One of my coffee-drinking friends does not like it. She’s gonna be amazed to learn that I wonder why other people do weird things. On the other hand, she’ll be so grateful that I didn’t mention her by name that she won’t be (too) mad at me!